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Posted: September 10th, 2023
‘’ You cannot live your life to please others. The choice must be yours.’’ – Alice in Wonderland.
It is a common thinking that parents should encourage and design a lifestyle for their kids as to take them on the straight path and to make a picture- perfect future so that they become successful. But they are too busy to glance up, look and understand, what goes on in the minds of youngsters. Making high school, years to study, and be with your books most hours of the day, limiting their sources, and keeping them treasured will not make them successful, because to become successful you don’t need to learn or memorize. Moreover, these external indicators can pressure children, sending the message that academic success is important, not for personal reasons, but to please others. An individual is good at something only if they do it with passion.
A person does his work wholly and completely only when one has an interest in it. Designing their futures might make them successful but unhappy at the same time. It is a dream of every parent to see their children become doctors and engineers one day. It curbs their talent and narrows their chance of fulfilling their dreams to zero. Talent is not learnt or taught, it comes naturally by birth. We should do something we are good, which comes from within us, rather doing something we are forced to. If you want to achieve anything with all your heart, no one can stop you from achieving it. To curb the talent of your kids might make them succeed in achieving the dream you see, but it will crush their dreams which they have been building forever.
It is a common perception that parents design a
Parents who are driven by the desire for publicity curb the natural talent of the child. He/she may develop a stage fear for rest of his life if he is put into a place where he feels out of place. (Meritnation). If one’s taught in the best possible way, he could precisely target what he wanted with the aid of knowing his true potentials and later on, achieve his wish-list effectively bloom into the person he’s meant to be. (TED Conversations) Emphasis on external standards may have its advantages, such as encouraging students to demonstrate high performance in school because it can lead to good grades and test scores, future college admission, and eventually employment in a prominent career.
However, these external indicators can pressure children, sending the message that academic success is important, not for personal reasons, but to please others. An individual can successfully exceed in his academics when there is enjoyment of attaining personal goals, working toward one’s potential, being curious and inquisitive, and trying one’s best. By emphasizing both types of standards, parents convey to their children that outstanding performance is important to success, but personal satisfaction and trying one’s best are also important, a balance that should help to alleviate feelings of pressure.
Because of high parental standards and criticism, these children are likely to experience feelings of pressure. Parents should focus on understanding of material and personal improvement in performance. Such a balance, especially when accompanied with support and guidance, is unlikely to foster feelings of pressure. (John Hopkins, Centre of talented Youth).
“The job of a parent is not to make your child’s way smooth, but rather to help her develop inner resources so she can cope.” ― Ellyn Satter
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